Calum Scott

Krit | Vancouver, Canada

Growing up, I never really felt like I could be myself. And for a long time, I built up this wall and presented myself as someone else. It was years of living a lie, and after a while, I didn’t know who I was anymore. I used to think that things would get better once I moved away from home. I believed I’d finally find my footing if I could be who I thought I was. But things didn’t really change all too much.

Being rejected both in life and career so many times has plunged me into depression more times than I could count. As if opening myself up to the world still wasn’t good enough. I felt like I no longer had a purpose and I would often contemplate on scenarios of how I would end it all. I am not sure when exactly the switch was flipped, but I realized I’ve visited these dark thoughts too often and decided to seek help. It is still a work in progress but life is not a straight line and there are many other directions. It is not a competition even when you are your own biggest competitor. I am now slowly finding ways to release myself from the pressures of meeting my own expectations. It’s a learning curve but I am enjoying life a little more by making friends, finding new hobbies, traveling a bit more, which I ended up meeting you in the process, Calum.

Growing up, I built up this wall as a guard, but it is long over due to feeling all these emotions. Just like hunger. If we don’t get hungry, we wouldn’t know we need to eat and we’d starve. So I now let myself feel the hunger.